my man

28.05.2013



it takes courage and big guts to walk in to my parents office.

and have a little chit chat about the plan of marrying me next year.

and that's what he actually did, today.


so i got a call from him, i thought he was joking, he said ' i might be dropping by to your parent's

office later'

and i was like;

'hahaha.. really ? why'

and he said; 'wanted to ask for their permission..'

my answer was ' yea, right!?'

and he hang up.

and he actually did it!!

and all those little things that he did, it is enough for me.

abis itu gue tanya dong; apa yang kamu rasain co?

jawabnya; jantung nya mau copot han..

hahahahha,

i may not say much about my boyfriend. what can i say, he is a man that love to stay out

of trouble, and knows exactly what he need to do, in a right time and a right moment.


to be a boy, to stand in front of the girl that he likes and tell her his feelings. i salute.

to be a grown up, to stand and brave himself to make a move to taste her lips. i salute.

to be a man, to walk and ask for her parents blessings to marry their daughter. i salute.


never said this before, but man, it's hard to born a baby boy. and when i have one, i want my

baby boy to have his daddy attitude. kills!

so i am officially getting married next year. FINALLY. for those of you who are getting a little bit

jealous after reading this, please take note. our journey is bitter sweet, so many ups and downs.

and on the 14th of may, we celebrate our 7th anniversary. yes, it's been quite awhile.


we've been through what if, or if only. few year of ' what if??' and 'if only'

this is not a fairy tale love story.

i am lucky that it is not.

because after what happened today. i don't want to sleep, i don't want to die. coz living,

breathing, is so real and full of Joy.

I love commitments 

it's tea with milk and sometimes they put toppings in it. this is life

ya begitulah hidup yah, bisa saya bilang era nya bubble tea lagi ngetrend lagi

cuma sekarang toppings yang tersedia beda beda, ga cuma bubble aja.

smakin banyak rasa yang ditawarkan atau smakin aneh toppings yang tersedia

disitulah orang orang mulai berkumpul , penasaran , ada yang mulai me favoritkan minuman tersebut

atau ada juga yang mulai berkenalan dgn rasa rasa baru yang sebelumnya belum pernah di coba

entah kenapa, saat ini, gue ngerasa kurang lebih begitu lah penjelasan dari arti kehidupan

in a simple way.



daripada having a quality time and having a nice conversation

with beloved friends, they rather went to someplace yang disebut sebut lagi trend, dan smua nya UNTUK

mempromosikan or rather memamerkan keberadaan mereka di restoran tersebut,

ato ada yg sibuk sesi poto poto makanan sampe kebetean sendiri saat ada salah satu temen yang ud

nyomot makanan itu dengan tidak sengaja merusak penampilan makanan tersebut.

ok. why is this issue become a problem in my mind, well basically lama kelamaan g ngerasa kita

mulai melakukan segala sesuatu nya sebagai objek utk di perhatikan/di pamerkan/ sebagai suatu

gambaran bagaimana kita mau dipandang oleh publik.


yah namanya juga jaman nya sosial media. segala sesuatu nya di jadikan pencitraan jadi diri.


i am not against all of those things that i mention above,

jadi gue ga mau di sambit pake batu kalo suatu hari di path gue, gue juga sering mention where i am at,

or what i am eating.

but, the BIG difference is, i am sharing those information to people that i consider as my close friends

or whom i feel comfortable sharing with.

ada yang bilang gue gila, norak, alay, ato lucu. whatever they think about me, gue ga mencoba utk menjual

ato mempromosikan sesuatu yang bukan 'diri gue'


tapi baru akir akir ini gue belajar, karena di bilang ALAY ama mantan gue, belajar untuk mikir,

kenapa sih, kita akirnya peduli banget apa yang orang lain pikirin tentang kita?? o oke so i gotta check in

or displaying my healthy lifestyle because because I WANT THEM TO SEE ME AS A HEALTHY 

PERSON, or, OH MAY GAWD i am so going to HANG OUT IN THIS BLA BLA RESTAURANT 

WITH MY ASIK GAUL BLA BLA FRIENDS. yang kece banget pas di poto gitu deh..

errr..

what ever happened to the world before social media happened?? LOTS ACTUALLY.

we hang out at our friends house, watching dvds together, or we go to the hair saloon together,

we talk about things that we would not forget, we laugh at something really funny and didn't really 

care about what's beeping at our mobile phone.


as i write this down, i was sitting at my favorite spot, at Gading serpong mall, favorite spot bagi gue adalah

tempat yang menyediakan TEH TARIK (tentunya) ato traditional coffee, tempat yang sepi ga terlalu rame

this is what i miss about my singapore days. a ME TIME to self reflect about what is happening to our

life lately, ato istilah nya buat ngaca, akir2 ini salah gue apa, atau saat saat dimana kita bs berfikir jernih 

mesti berbuat apa, dan untuk bersyukur. smuanya ini pasti kepikiran aja, saat kita punya waktu untuk diri

kita sendiri.

people who are afraid to be alone are the loneliest people in fact. those who use their alone time 

as a time to reflect, grateful and to observe are the most happy and joyful people in fact. in my 

opinion.


so what i was trying to say ; the world is changing my friend, gloriously, rapidly.

but it doesn't mean that it is for you to FOLLOW, to JUDGE, to put people under different categories.

NO NO.

ga punya path, ato ga suka mention lagi di gym, bukan berarti ga suka ke gym ato ga gaul. ato sebaliknya

 mention lagi di gym belom tentu nge gym! hayo! 

and quality time was rare to find. ayo, coba  lebih fokus ama 'pegi dengan siapa nya' daripada 'pegi kemana nya'

ato lebih fokus dengan 'kualitas pembicaraan nya' daripada 'pamer makanannya'

rasa yang di tawarkan dunia saat ini banyak loh. justru kalo kita terbawa kita akan bingung sebenernya

yang penting itu apa yang kita fikirkan ato apa yang publik fikirkan?

gue bersyukur, dengan usia yang lumayan tua ini gue masi bisa enjoy this so called new generation era in

my own way, dan gue juga punya my kind of 'OLD AND TRADITIONAL' me.

sebagai anak jakarta yang masi tetep pengen eksis, g demen pergi ke kafe kafe, DI HARI WEEKDAYS 

only karena menurut gue sabtu dan minggu penuh dengan anak2 abg yang lagi seneng seneng nya bergaul

dari mall ke mall

sedangkan untuk weekend gue lebih seneng di rmh baca buku, liat review review musik baru ato 

ke toko buku dan toko kaset kesukaan sambil ngeliatin strangers. HA!

gotta keep yourself the real you guys,

as much as i like cha time hazelnut milk tea, tetep gue ga bisa nolak teh tarik panas, dengan butter

sugar toast sebagai pendamping


atau, seberapa eksis nya gue di path / instagram / pinterest tetep gue ga bisa lepas dari yahoo.com.sg news ato

detik.com supaya ga ketinggalan berita

atau, seberapa keren nya social media yang beredar, gue masi tetep feel comfortable with my

so called PUBLIC DIARY yaitu blog ini lah.

people can say anything they want, but to be brave to say NO or SPEAK UP your mind is the only 

line that makes you stands out from others.

jadii bapa bapa ibu ibu, let'S stop speculating or judging yo. social media is another personality

yang untuk sebagian orang mgkn untuk mendisplay another side of him/her atau utk sebagian orang

cuma sebagai produk untuk mencerminkan jati diri mereka yang sesungguh nya.


but if you have to ask, bubble tea or teh tarik. definitely teh tarik, most of the time.

too many memories, too many love stories. :)

















eh, mendadak m

:)

keep on pushing the replay button again and again.







so i went to tex saverio's fashion show yesterday and it was AMAZING

i almost cried when the last outfit was out.

somehow, it was my fist moment ever being proud to be indonesian,

because of him, to create such magnificent outfits that are lovely and

crazy details in one word, it look stunning, just beautiful.

i really hope i could taste a little bit of tex saverio's fashion life,

and live on that moment.

missing you, singapore

Things that I miss about living in singapore :

1. Comfort taxi. I called them to drive me to my workplace almost every morning because I was always late.

2. Esplanade. I love going to esplanade, because there's so many things influenced by art. U can hear a band playing great songs, you can see the singapore river, have a great dinner. Love it!

3. New creation church. My church. I miss it so much, I used to go to the church, every sunday ALONE. Queue up for the service, and had a great time there.

4. HMV. I used to spend all night at hmv, after work, just to browse around, listening to the new songs that they played, and write down the title, and check out their cd.

5. Tanglin road. I love orchard, but tanglin road always gives me a great mood.

6. East coast park. Hahaha! Beach, bicycle and eat. What's not to like,

7. Siloso beach.

8. Ann siang hill and haji lane. Shopping heaven.

9. Dine at wheelock, then walk down to cineleisure for cinema, not enough? We went to youth park for supper.

10. The walk from orchard to river valley and clar quay. It is a long distance, however I just love it. :)

11. Singapore 24 hours MCDONALD's. Different with indo, at sg MCD you will meet all kinds of human being, who tells their own story there.

12. I miss the atmosphere, of walking around the town, with your ipod on, and you are listening to your favorite song, while observing the way other people dressing up.

13. Hongkong cafe.

14. China town. :D

15. Mrt, slept over at mrt, waiting for the mrt, rushing to get in, etc. Etc. Etc.

27 and counting

it supposed to be your favorite month of the year,




until something happened and you remember you are 27 soon




so you look around and see how life changes on your best friend, colleagues, or relatives.




then you looked down




you were thinking about those things that you wish would happened when you are 27




you lost count on how it passed so quickly,




you thought you were 21 yesterday,




you got your first tattoo.




and now, even when God has given you a job, activities and loyal best friend who knows you inside




and out, there is still a missing piece that makes you incomplete.




no other that opposite sex.



so what's the big deal about this partnership thingy.



it is a big deal actually



it is a big deal when you have been in a 6 years relationship and you can't even look eye to eye having heart to heart conversation.



or when you had this 2 years relationship, and all you did was to make her happy and stick with you



but it didn't work either.



or when you witnessed your friend who was single for 9 years, suddenly met someone and get married.


i had all these thoughts when i was driving home couple hours a go.



and after a long thought, i was amazed that somehow, all of this shits that happened to those who are



so called 'unlucky enough in love' makes them stronger and bolder, to face anything in this world.



they are different, and they know what's gonna happened, best, they know how to handle them self,



and bring back their feet to stand up straight on the ground.



things happened, and things just didn't. you can said you tried, you suffer, you sacrifice,



but when it didn't happened, all those things wont keep her on your side. vice versa ,



my dear friend of mine. i love you. and i am so so sure, that love will strike you down soon,



a different one, not the one that will make you suffer and experiencing things for 8 years or more, and



also not the one who you thought you have given everything that you could, for the past 2 years.



but it will.



and as for me. by the time i got home, i went to my workshop and sat. and i know, i thank god, i have a



job that i can love day and night. and a fine coffee from Starbucks, and this has been part of me for a

long long time, to be alone, with fabrics and drawings.

and to dreams about things that i wanted to happened in my life.

and like what aerosmith said 'dreams until your dreams come true'

lite my fire

i used to smoke 1 pack a day,

i used to carry Marlboro red and lucky strike red every day.

that has been going on for 4 years.

but i don't like to smoke in public, i enjoyed it when i am alone in my room

when i wake up, before i go to sleep, when i draw, or thinking.

it used to be my moment. it's like breathing to me

i decided to stop when i witnessed that my dad's health is worsen

and when my teeth is not as glowing anymore

and when my skin is not so radiance anymore

i stop for almost 3 years now. :)

and today when i should have finish my work i stressed out i freaked out and..,

i took 1 cigarette from my mom's purse.

went to my room and have a little break, and lit my cigarette

and suddenly, i felt no urge to smoke, i feel bitter in my mouth.

i don't feel like smoking.

so i stop

it's weird but God work in mysterious way

maybe it came across my mind as well how terrible it affects my skin and

i just spend almost 300sgd$ to bleach my teeth. yup it is that bad,

so guys, i do believe everything that is happening in your life, there is some

decision being made. please don't be afraid to be wrong,

and don't be afraid to tell God that you need help

and don't be afraid to come to God with everything that you are,

whether you are a smoker, drinker, gambler, or if you have any addiction condition

He knows, and His judgement is over. He is on your side to tell you, whatever it is

He loves you, and you are His beloved forever.

so when you remember how much God loves you. that urge to smoke will fade away.

coz His Grace and love reign over sins.

now, i rather listening to God's grace and love towards me

rather than, smoke and thinking what would i be tomorrow.

love,

+tsl